GREAT EXPECTATIONS

Today I leave for my writing conference. As I previously blah, blah, blogged, I'm not looking forward to it. Instead of coming back energized, I usually return home with a sort of melancholy aura.

Why is that? Well, I think it is because I had great expectations from other conferences and was disappointed. One thing I have learned in life is that expectations are really premeditated resentments.

I do, however, have moderate expectations of this conference. Why would I put out the big bucks to go? I expect to meet some nice people - and they don't get better than children's book writers and illustrators. I expect to learn something - that is the real reason I attend - to learn more about writing and the industry.

I enjoy watching people. I should be more aggressive when it comes to presenting myself (to editors, to agents), but I am  not an in-your-face type. There are many "iyf" people...they are the ones running around with a manuscript waving it in front of anyone who is interested, or the self-publishers who want you to look at their book.

I stay on the side lines. Maybe it's a safety thing. Maybe I don't want to look desperate. But, that's who I am.

So I prepare to go. And this time with expectations, but not too many.

Stay tuned and I will let you know how it goes on Monday.

Anyone interested in the education of our children needs to click onto this link and read  the January 2011 edition of The School Administrator entitled, Kindergarten Boot Camp? About Face!, by Edward Miller and Joan Almon.
http://www.aasa.org/SchoolAdministratorIssue.aspx?id=17428

CONFERENCES – CONFIDENCE BUILDER OR CAREER CRUSHER

In less than two weeks I will be hitting Alligator Alley headed to a writer’s conference in Miami. Conferences are vital for anyone who desires publishing. They are full of agents, publishers, workshops, the latest inside scoop on the industry. They are the pep rally before the big game. Everyone loves them, anticipates them and is uber charged to attend.

Everyone but me.

I am dreading the upcoming conference like the swine flu.

Will I meet a lot of writers struggling like me?  Yes.

Will I exchange ideas?  Yes

Will I get great food? (Always a plus in my book)  YES

A nice room?  You bet!

A great roommate? Definitely!!

Will I hear all the things I need or want to here?  Need to hear:  Yes. Want to here:  Questionable.

The workshop facilitators are as enthusiastic as cheerleaders shouting the praises of their team, vigorously shaking their pom-poms of optimism and whipping the crowd into a writing frenzy.

Everyone but me.

I sit up front, I listen, I take notes, I really like the advice given. Then I hear it – those dreaded words from the publishers and agents. “We get millions of manuscripts a year and are only able to publish five.”

That, I say, is the pin in the balloon of enthusiasm.

Do I sound jaded? Yes. I shouldn’t because, one big “benny” from these conferences is the opportunity to send a manuscript into a publishing company that will not accept unsolicited or unagented manuscripts.

Sounds good – but last year was a bust for me. I sent in my best manuscript to an editor that was represented at that particular conference. I followed all their submission guidelines like they were carried down the mountain by Moses.

 So far, so good.

 Then nothing – I heard nothing, but I understand that waiting is part of the game.

 So far, so good.

A few months into the wait I read in one of my writers’ magazines that this particular editor had quit the company and had not moved to another as of that printing.

 So far, not so good.

I contacted the company. They had no record of my manuscript.

So much for that benefit!!!

Even though I am not as impressed as I once was with these conferences, I do meet great people. I receive great ideas and information about the writing profession. And, I continue to hold onto the hope that perhaps, just perhaps, I may be one of those lucky five in a million.

CRITIQUE GROUPS - A HUMBLING EXPERIENCE

I attend two critique groups. One is made up of writers of children's books. The other is made up of various genres - people who are writing memoirs to share with their families, playwrights, Ph.D's up-dating books they once published, poets--even an actress from England is among us. It is a humbling experience -- so many voices --  all writing from the heart and head...using their pencils, pens, computers to retell, teach, relate experiences I can only imagine from words on a page.

I love listening to the others. I am transported into another time, involved in another life. Their stories are amazing--the places they have been--the adventures they have had...their triumphs, their sorrows...all documented for others.

The poets write deep, meaningful, spiritual poems. I don't often understand them, but I appreciate the lilt of the words.

I read my stories. I learn much from their constructive criticism, I gain confidence to continue from their encouraging words. It's funny how many little things I can overlook in a manuscript. Take yesterday, for instance. One of the women in my group pointed out how many times I used a particular word in one of my chapters. OMG, I never saw it. If not for a critique group - this error would have gone unchecked.

If you are a writer -- a serious writer trying to get published -- do you belong to a critique group? If not, it's well worth the time. It's a humbling experience, but the help you will receive is priceless!!

FEAR: False Evidence Appearing Real

I learned many years ago that fear was my enemy.  Like a dementor from a Harry Potter book, it sucked out all the happiness from my life. It robbed me of joy and filled my soul with worry. WHAT A COLOSSAL WASTE OF TIME!

The media today is full of doom and gloom. It would make the most optimistic people want to curl up and throw a blanket over their heads. A sort of "make the world go away" mentality.

I learned many years ago to conquer fear...to sweep it away like unwanted cobwebs in the corners of my mind. How? Faith!! Faith is the opposite of fear.

Take, for example, submitting manuscripts. In the past, I kept all my stories locked away in silent file folders on my computer...never to see the light of day or an editors desk. Why? Fear of rejection. How crazy is that??

Just think about it - they were already rejected -- 100% of the time -- by me. Okay, okay, I know, I know -- now they are rejected 100% of the time -- by editors, but at least I have a chance...of someday...seeing my text in print. I have FAITH that this will happen.

Remember:  Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forward. So I keep writing and sending and waiting and hoping...

WAITING FOR INSPIRATION

I'm still waiting for the inspiration - that "aha" moment - to give me just what I need for the picture book contest I would like to enter. I have until February to come up with a masterfully worded, never before seen in print, earth shattering manuscript for the world of publishing.

To tell you the truth, I don't like writing picture books. Some people think they are easy to pen because so few words are needed. That is precisely what makes them tricky. Even Sherlock Holmes would have difficulty discovering the right words for a pb manuscript.

In addition, they are impossible to sell. Publishers receive thousands of pb manuscripts a year and only publish a handful. They are expensive to produce and in today's ecomony, parents aren't exactly beating a path to Barnes and Noble to buy them.

God helps those who help themselves. So, instead of sitting in the lotus position and chanting some inane mantra all day, I decided the only way to get inspiration is to get busy.

I plunked down in front of my computer, took a deep breath and  let my fingers scurry across the keyboard. Did I come up with anything noteworthy? For the contest...no. But, I do have five ideas down on paper. And, for me that's a grand start. I will re-visit my attemps daily and let the thoughts simmer in my mind when I walk. Eventually something will pop.

Inspiration is there - somewhere - faith, courage and and hard work are all it takes to find it.

READING IS WRITING - RIGHT??

My, my, my - I keep getting further and further (or is it farther and farther?) behind in my blog writing. But, I've been reading lately. Reading is writing, right?

I read for a number of reasons.

1. Enjoyment.
2. To study the market.
3. To get ideas.
4. To "listen" to the lilt of words.
5. To see how other authors write - the qualities that make their books page turners.

I find reading a good way to kick start my brain when it is asleep and the words aren't pouring out like an afternoon rain. I like to sit with a pad and pencil and capture action verbs - why didn't I think of that one, I say to myself, when I come upon a particularly good phrase.

I even keep a book full of action verbs. Full of adjectives. Full of color words. I even read that book now and then.

                                                       * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Today I am totally frustrated. There is a contest I would like to enter. Easy - peasy. They want books written for kindergartners. My field. My love. My area of expertise. When I taught I could write a million books for my class. Guess what - today nothing is coming to mind. NOTHING. How crazy is that??

I've learned in life not for force things. So I wait. I wait for an idea, for a theme, for anything to get me started.

Until then I read. Reading is writing - right??

Happy New Year everyone. May this year be filled with wonder and love and good health for you!!!